International

INDIA is to build a state of the art, multi-million dollar hospital on the moon.

FORMER US Secretary of State Colin Powell last night reassured white voters that Barak Obama's Oval Office will not be filled with the thick fug of ganja cigarettes.

A DAMAGING split emerged at the United Nations last night as western governments called for a new resolution guaranteeing the right to do it on a beach.

THE US presidential campaign turned negative last night as Republican Sarah Palin warned white women they will soon become Barak Obama's beeatches.

DEMOCRATIC candidate Barak Obama last night claimed he was quoted out of context after describing Governor Sarah Palin as a 'creationist psycho bitch'.

AMERICA became the world's largest council estate last night after the US government bought all the houses.

REPUBLICAN vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin last night wowed the party convention as she pledged to 'git me one uppity niggra'.

RUSSIA brushed aside the threat of EU sanctions last night, stressing it is a vast country, filled to bursting with absolutely everything it needs.

VICE presidential candidate Joe Biden was last night urged to reveal who his vice president will be when Barak Obama is assassinated by a racist psychopath.

THE US and Poland yesterday signed an historic agreement which will guarantee the total destruction of the eastern European state.