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Insanely camp art critic attacks pantomime

“Dear, darling, scrumptious Corrie has become too, too modern and ghastly and deserves to have its lovely northern bottom thoroughly spanked with an ageing loofa,” says the experiment known as Brian Sewell

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Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Cancer (21 JUN-22 JUL)Time to have your bowels examined after you take a dump at a music festival and the Portaloo throws up.

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