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Kneecap to sue bastards who nicked their thing

KNEECAP have announced they are taking legal action against punk band Bob Vylan for stealing anti-Israel publicity that was rightfully theirs. 

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How to prove you have the train door button situation well under control

THE train is into the station. You’re closest to the door button. But you sense the other passengers’ doubt. Can he handle this? Will he crack up? Show them they’re wrong: 

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