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Love Island contestants horrified by entrant with unbleached anus

A MAN whose rear end has never been anything other than vigorously washed has been allowed to enter Love Island, to the horror of other contestants. 

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A copy of the Metro, and other presents for people with January birthdays

FRIEND selfish enough to be born in January? Insensitively expecting a birthday present regardless of your overdraft? These make ideal cost-effective gifts: 

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