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How to get completely over your lifelong thing for pale sensitive English boys by marrying a f**king bear

GOT a type? But sick of being let down by sensitive, poetic English or English-adjacent boys unworthy of your love? Here’s how to drop all that and marry a big-ass bear: 

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Should I move to Dubai? The pros and are you f**king mental?, weighed up

LIFE’S going okay for you here in Britain, so should you move to a hardline Islamic monarchy in the desert? We consider the pluses and the absolutely f**k nos: 

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