This is nothing to do with my penis not working properly anymore. By Jeremy Clarkson

MY hatred of Meghan that’s cellular and keeps me awake at night has no connection, I can categorically state, with my non-functioning penis.

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Five ideal gifts for scowling, ungrateful teenagers

SHOPPING for your miserable adolescent who last removed their headphones in March? These five presents won’t even make a dent in their resentment:

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