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Success of lockdown 'entirely dependent on everyone actually doing it'

SCIENTISTS have put forward the controversial theory that lockdowns only work if the public actually bothers to f**king observe them. 

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Government to ignore breakthrough vaccine for one designed by old Oxford chum that doesn't work

THE UK government has greeted news of a viable Covid-19 vaccine by ordering a different one made by an old schoolfriend with a zero per cent success rate. 

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