Subscribe

Salmond votes ‘No’

ALEX Salmond has voted ‘No’ to Scottish independence.

Checking article access…

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday
privacy

Chelsea to sign 'next Messi' the moment he's born

CHELSEA is to pounce for a Romanian labelled ‘the next Lionel Messi’ as soon as his umbilical cord is cut.

Checking article access…

Next story ›