Couple who do f**k all outraged they can't go out and do things

A COUPLE who never get off their arses are furious that they are not supposed to go anywhere at the moment.

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Receipts at bottom of woman's handbag enough to wipe arse on for three years

A WOMAN is unconcerned about running out of loo roll because she has at least 3,000 crumpled receipts in her handbag.

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