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Pampas grass means swingers: Sex secrets of the suburbs

THE British suburbs may seem a sexless desert of women in gardening kneepads and men washing cars, but they are actually red-hot pits of depravity. These are the signs: 

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The wanker's guide to chatting up the new barmaid

THE new barmaid has been ignoring you so far but she’s just playing hard to get. Here’s how to use your charms to win her round:

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