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Buy a Prius or Mork will shoot you in the face, say experts

MORK from Ork will blast your face off unless you reduce your average fuel consumption to 62 miles per gallon, scientists have warned.

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Cat denies assaulting other cat

JAZZY, a six-year-old ginger cat, has denied starting the vicious fight which left his black-and-white neighbour Sparks needing three stitches.

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