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Cash-strapped Area 51 tells captive aliens to get a job

EXTRA-TERRESTRIALS living at the American military’s secret containment facility must go out and earn their keep, it was announced last night.

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Anger as millions denied chance to look at Bin Laden's brain instead of working

MILLIONS of people across the world have been denied the chance to use up the best part of their morning staring at the gloopy contents of Osama Bin Laden’s ruptured head.

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