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Holiday to celebrate dragon-slaying or death of 2,000 Frenchmen

ENGLAND faces the tantalising choice of a national holiday that celebrates either the slaying of a fictional animal by a made-up saint or the violent deaths of a great many French people.

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Cupcakes will not plug gaping chasm where your soul used to be, say experts

SMALL cakes with brightly-coloured icing will not bring boundless childish glee to your meaningless existence, it has been confirmed.

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