Subscribe

One Woman's Week: Reinventing The Train

People these days have to get their priorities right and stop crying like a bunch of wallies because the pound shop 'just isn't the same' as Woollies, and the mall's pick'n'mix is 'extortionate'.

Checking article access…

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday
privacy

Time To Abandon Britain As Greggs Becomes Too Expensive

BRITAIN is 'well and truly, Geordie-lass-on-her-hen-night fucked' if people can no longer afford to eat at Greggs, financial analysts warned last night.

Checking article access…

Next story ›