Taurus (April 20-May 20) Summoned by the mightiest and most powerful races in the land, you're charged with the mission of going somewhere unbelievably dangerous with a ring of ultimate evil before dumping it into a massive volcano. Like fuck you will.   Gemini (21 MAY-20 JUN) There's something at the back of your fridge that resembles a walnut made of blue cheese. Saturn says you should eat it and then let me know what happens.   Cancer (21 JUN-22 JUL) Despite his quiet demeanour, your neighbour is not so much a wolf in sheep's clothing as a rabid wolverine in wolf's clothing. Just let him keep the lawnmower.

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