Tories To Buy Darling A House

THE Conservative Party last night offered to buy chancellor Alistair Darling the home of his dreams.

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Guest Blog: Michael Mcintyre

HEEELLLLOOOOOO EVERYONE! Yes, that's right – it's little old me, using my laptop to type words for you lovely people to read with your mincemeat pies. Speaking of laptop computers, whenever I'm on a train and I see someone using theirs, they've always got that really, really smug look on their face which says 'LAPTOP – I'VE GOT A LAPTOP! AND I'M GOING TO TAP AWAY…tap! tap! tap! Look at me, tappety! tap! tap! I'm more important than you because I have a computer sitting on my lap'. Have you ever noticed that? No? Well I have and I happen to think it's extremely perceptive.

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