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'Yeah, I hate to back Starmer, but can we stay the f**k out of this war?'

By Martin Bishop, aged 53, who is normally as pro-war as anyone

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Gig ticket cost to be inversely linked to how many new songs they play

THE price of concert tickets will now be reduced based on how many tracks from their new album nobody gives a f**k about the audience has to endure. 

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