Subscribe

Children at state schools fling dung for a living. My nice children deserve better

By Abigail Pennson, our reasonable, plain-speaking middle-class columnist who would die for Kate, no questions asked

Join Mash Premium today

Unlimited ad-free access, exclusive stories

£0 first month

  • One Month for Free
  • £3 per month thereafter
Start Trial Now
Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday
privacy

​​Man unsure if he had nice evening or was just drunk

A MAN is unsure whether he had a great time last night or if he was just pissed, it has emerged.

Join Mash Premium today

Unlimited ad-free access, exclusive stories

£0 first month

  • One Month for Free
  • £3 per month thereafter
Start Trial Now
Next story ›