The Archbishop of Canterbury on... the Tories knowing f**k all about the British way of life

1st March 2024

WAKING up with a headache that feels like my brain matter has been trampled by an angry donkey, I reflect on the events of the last two days. I had attended an informal international event, established in 1886 among the world’s Archbishops: a masturbation contest.

Join Mash Premium today

Unlimited ad-free access, exclusive stories

£0 first month

One Month for Free
£3 per month thereafter

Start Trial Now

Already have an account? Sign in HERE

How to scrape out a compliment about your partner's genitals, with the Mash sex columnist

29th February 2024

JUST like when a friend asks your opinion on a poem they’ve written, it can be hard to find nice things to say about your partner’s junk. But anything that may boost your chances of oral sex is worth a go.