Celebrity

CHERYL Cole jetted off to Los Angeles last night, but sent wayward husband Ashley a poignant message by swapping her wedding ring for a mini chicken kiev.

CHERYL Cole's refusal to indulge in graphic sexual misdemeanours is causing 'deep and lasting pain' to Britain's men, it emerged yesterday.

TV presenter Vernon Kaye's missus shouldn't get her knickers in a twist over a bit of saucy fun, Seventies experts said last night.

PASSAGES in the Old Testament predicted the split between Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, according to a leading academic.

FORMER pop sensations Hear'say have reunited to dish out brutal street-style justice to Britain's hardest thugs.

OBESE Americans last night rejected Jamie Oliver's latest food campaign by deep frying him in hog fat and eating his head.

HOLLYWOOD superstar Warren Beatty has had sexual intercourse with you, it emerged last night.

FANS of Cockney duo Chas and Dave threatened to attack the Royal Family last night after this year's novelty honour was awarded to Status Quo.

MILLIONS of people across Britain were furious last night after it emerged this year's Celebrity Big Brother contestants will not beg Jesus for mercy as they are flayed alive over white-hot coals.

HER Majesty the Queen will use her Christmas message to reflect on what a thoroughly ghastly year it has been for the likes of you.