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Government to ignore breakthrough vaccine for one designed by old Oxford chum that doesn't work

THE UK government has greeted news of a viable Covid-19 vaccine by ordering a different one made by an old schoolfriend with a zero per cent success rate. 

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How to socialise outside without freezing your tits off

UNDER lockdown, England can only socialise by exercising with one other person outdoors – and it’s bloody freezing. These tips will help: 

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