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The five stages of trying to connect to train wifi, from hope to abject rage and despair

THOUGHT you’d do a bit of work using the train wifi? Think again, fool. Here’s how attempting to connect will break your spirit in five depressing stages.

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How to dodge an end-of-date kiss without openly saying 'F**k no!'

IT’S that magical moment when your awful date has come to an end. But the other person may want a kiss and you can’t say outright they haven’t got a f**king chance. What should you do?

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