Subscribe

Boundary of North decided by measuring Kent resident's lip curl

THE government is to decide where the North begins by putting a Kent man on the train to Leeds and measuring his disdain.

Checking article access…

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday
privacy

You will be judged on approach to M25 from M4, warns God

MORTALS will be judged on whether they choose to jump the queue for the M25, God has confirmed.

Checking article access…

Next story ›