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I'll Leave Britain For A Million Pounds, Says Everyone

IF the government wants to spend £1m getting one family to leave Britain then it should start with the people who have lived here the longest, it was claimed last night.

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Flood Warning As Peter Andre's Tears Form Pathetic Lake Of Sorrow

EXPERTS have warned that unless Peter Andre stops weeping over his divorce much of southern England could soon be submerged by his pathetic tears.

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