Dear Holly, I’m suffering from a rather embarrassing problem in that I am finding it nigh on impossible to achieve an erection and I can’t work out why. The other evening, after the usual 17 pints, nine pork pies and 60 Lambert and Butler, I staggered home from the pub and roused my snoring wife for a spot of heavy intercourse. After she’d put her teeth in and taken a quick dump, she parted her remarkably hairy thighs as I drunkenly attempted to mount her. But after 15 minutes of flaccid humping, nothing was stirring so we gave up and watched Foyle’s War instead. My wife reckons the Feng Shui in our bedroom is slightly off. Is she right?Marcus,Lowestoft

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