Celebrity

WHEN Prince William arrived in St Andrews on a bright September morning in 2001, the Scottish seaside town, famous for its golf and its wind, would never be the same again for four years.

FRIENDS and colleagues of celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay are today continuing their search for the top of his head.

SPECULATION was growing last night over which international pop superstar likes to get buck naked and ride bareback on a pot-bellied pig.

HOLLY Willoughby and Fearne Cotton are the twin sisters of Beelzebub and must be destroyed at all costs, experts have claimed.

BRITAIN faced a fresh pop crisis last night after it emerged that X Factor favourite Cher Lloyd has been behaving like a teenage girl.

CHERYL Cole dismissed claims of racism last night, insisting it has been years since she physically attacked a black person.

TROUBLED actress Lindsay Lohan is still highly do-able despite all the drugs, doctors have conceded.

DAVID Beckham has angrily denied claims he slept with a prostitute insisting he could only ever be unfaithful to his wife with a contractually branded tart.

THE Queen will today have soup and sandwiches at her Edinburgh home with an insane German criminal she met off a plane.

VICTORIOUS housemate Josie Gibson is to become 'home' for a tiny submarine carrying Celebrity Big Brother contestants, it has emerged.