Society

BARONESS Thatcher was making a remarkable recovery from illness last night, as she gained sustenance from Britain's collective trauma.

EFFORTS to get Britain's stupidest people online by 2011 have been suspended after free modems were boiled or used as hats.

POLICE are stopping disproportionate numbers of ethnic minorities purely so that they can act 'street', it has emerged.

A PROGRAMME of paid sterilisation is to be extended to people who are still watching Glee.

PRINCE William has fuelled speculation that an official Royal dumping could come as early as next February.

AS Christmas menus appear in offices across the country, Britain's workers are facing up to another festive evening of compulsory enjoyment.

THE Twitter experiment by Greater Manchester police failed last night after officers were unable to add a third word to their tweets.

UNIVERSITIES should be be able to charge up to £12,000 a year for magic beans, according to a major review of higher education funding.

FOOD shoppers could really do without the pictures of chubby farmers and the word 'classic', according to a new survey.

THE pay gap between men and tasty birds who have nice little arses and a smashing set of knockers shows no signs of closing, according to new research.