Sport

MICHAEL Owen believes his career in being seated can continue at the highest level after leaving Manchester United.

THE announcement of England’s squad has triggered no excitement ahead of the Euro 2012 tournament.

FOOTBALLER Joey Barton has confessed to stealing his philosophising tough guy persona from the lead character in the 1989 movie Road House.

PREMIER League football is in some way linked with lots of money, internet sleuths have claimed.

RECENT extreme weather proves that the Almighty sees cricket as a abomination, it has been claimed.

FRESHLY-CONDEMNED England manager Roy Hodgson is to name a Euro 2012 squad of 23 players including young Sarah’s lad.

SEVERAL Premier League chairmen have expressed an interest in manager Delio Rossi's player-punching talents.

AUTHORITIES in Manchester have warned of an unprecedented level of bollocks.

THE wretched life of Roy Hodgson has finally hit rock bottom with his appointment as England manager.

NEXT week's Manchester derby has been cancelled in favour of a titanic psychic battle between the two managers.